I think there are elements of this “Asian” upbringing in many places; Upper Canada has many elements of that “don’t stand out” ethos, complete with a proverb (“tall poppies will be cut down”). But the Tiger Mother ethic takes it to another degree of intensity.

Consider also that Asians are not automatons, and as parents they’re susceptible to every flaw white parents are, i.e. being controlling, trying to live through their children vicariously or use them to climb socially, and the like. I’m not convinced that the attitudes we talk about as “Asian-American” have ever been that rare among whites or any other group.

That’s true, it can give that impression. But these days even average is considered ugly. :)

The best example I can give you is a relatively untainted 9 year old who’s having a puppy crush on his classmate. It’s not because she’s beautiful, it’s because “she’s so funny!”. Yes, she’s pretty too but there are much prettier girls – only they aren’t funny, nor are they cool to hang out with.

I think many Polish people could relate to Yang’s upbringing. Appearances are extremely important to them too. So yes, they don’t have a monopoly on that.

If I remember correctly, Yang doesn’t have problems getting with white ladies. He, who rebelled, refused to take a steady job (or later, one with benefits), he didn’t write a masterpiece, he didn’t get laid (for a while) and, I imagine, he smoked a fair amount of weed, also claims with a weird pride “I have never dated a Korean woman.” While that doesn’t explicitly say that his girlfriends have been primarily white and/of other Asian decent, I’d bet a beer on it.

(Tortured writer casting off his suburban lifestyle to live in a ramshackle mansion and have issues holding a job? Sounds ripe for an arty white girl, especially if there’s weed.)

That’s part of what makes this piece so weird: it’s a sort of Asian/Asian-american cultural roundup that vaguely responds to/attempts to capitalize on Amy Chua, and in my opinion, this one is suuuuper disjointed.

Meeting and striking up a conversation are necessary first steps to finding love and connecting with someone, and I know a number of decent men and women who have a lot of trouble doing that. So I sympathize, even if the adolescent fantasy sold by the PUA crowd (“with these techniques, you can get ANY woman you want to do ANYTHING you want, blah blah blah”) makes me more than a little ill.